Some couples seem to take the position that divorce will not impact their children once the children have grown up and moved out of the house. They are adults now, so parents believe that shields them from the divorce.

However, researchers have found that this is not necessarily true. Young adults still believe that the world “should be” a certain way. One thing they take for granted is that their parents are together. It’s something they have known for their entire lives.

In that sense, it may be harder on them than on young children. Younger kids have had less time to feel comfortable with that family relationship. They may be too young to really understand and may forget how life used to be over time. Young adults do understand, and they will not forget.

This is not to say that you should not get divorced. Only you know the specifics of your situation.

But it is to say that you need to consider your kids when you split up. How should you tell them? What changes are you bringing into their lives, both emotional and practical? For instance, does the divorce change your estate planning or family holiday schedule? What can you do to put the kids first, no matter how old they are, as you split up?

These are the important questions to ask. Make sure you know all of the different options you have during a divorce and how you and your spouse can seek the best possible outcome for your entire family, not just for yourselves.